Me : “Do you still talking with him?”
Sister : “Uhmm.. not really, i’m trying to avoid him..”
Me : “Why? Is there something wrong?”
Sister : “For him, I don’t think so, but for me, yes I have a big, no no, really big problem, so i thought it for long time, I should better not to talk with him”
Me : “Do you really like uhmm… ya, how I call it, love? Do you have any feelings to him? Did he know your feelings?”
Sister : “I don’t know, i really don’t know what kind of feelings is this, I just….. i can’t get him out of my head, you know what? He likes a growing addiction that I can’t deny. I just… “, talking with tears on her cheek..
Oh, my God, she just cried. I don’t know how hard she tried to keep it for long time.
Me : “Hmm.. Do you really sure about him? I mean, yeah, I know, we can’t avoid feelings but we can’t keep it if that hurt us, or well yeah we can pray to Allah to keep it for the right person for us. Well, we both knew that right? But, in my opinion, when you have any feelings to someone, and you really want to make it with him, I mean, you have desire to live with, why don’t you try to ask him? In this case you can ask an intercessor to help you. How?”
Sister : “But, I don’t have courage, I am not confident with myself whether I am worthy for him or not, you know I am nothing, I am not pretty, I am not intelligence, I am just nothing…” in crying sound.
Me : ” No honey, don’t say such things, you are great, and if a guy reject your proposal, it means he doesn’t know what kind of wife should he takes, and he will be a losers. And I think, he has the same feelings as you.. . Well yeah, i am not that sure as well, because you know i am not a physcology or even I am not a medium. Hehehehe..” my voice was bland..
She just look on floor. I am saying this in really “dunno what I just said” I don’t even know that kind of suggestion. Fiuuuh..
Sister : ” So, should I tell him, “Would you marry me, Sir?” ? ” she smile and try to stop crying.
Me : ” If you sure after you do Istikharaa, then just tell him, because you have known its consequences right? Accepted or rejected. So, better you tell him through an intercessor. Because the more you keep it, the more you get hurt. Honey.. “ I told her confidently.
Sister : “Should I?” She asked me, with her sparkling eyes.
Me : “Bismillah, Allah by your side, sweety.. “ I answered her with a kiss in her cheek.
Then she hugged me. I saw her face, she looked more cute and better after she spoke it up to me. You know the feelings when you can destroy a huge stone on your life? You were relieved. And she just felt that.
Sister : “Then, sister, how about you? do you still wait for that guy? Does he know your feelings?”
Me : ” Hahaha, don’t ask me that, too tired to think it, and there are still many things to think about than that. Don’t worry, Allah knows me better, honey, InshaAllah i’ll get the best from Him. I believe in Him. 🙂 ”
Sister : ” Well, just curious, because you told me those things, but you were.. yeah,, haha :-p”
Me : “Well, I know what am I doing. So no need to worry. Just think about yourself.”
The most thing i hate is, when I am always pretending to be strong, but I am not that strong. But I do believe, every single thing in my life, Allah always accompany me, He always by my side. If I have a weakness, I don’t want to make people I love worry, they have nothing to do with my difficult time. Because they have own difficult time as well, so please don’t give them more problem to be solved. And we must be a problem solver not a trouble makers..
MA, Cimahi, 161112